It's all about me!

When a conflict arises between any pair (be it a romantic relationship, a business relationship, a family relationship, or even strangers), our initial reaction is to automatically blame the other person.  It's their fault, right?  You didn't do anything.  Of course not, you are perfect!

I beg to differ, dear friend.

Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother's eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? --Matthew 7:3

Jesus is saying that before you speak negatively about another person, before you judge them, before you evaluate their self worth, look at you.

No one is perfect other than Jesus.  It is perfectly ok that you did something wrong.  What is not ok, is if you think what you did wrong doesn't matter, and then on top of it, you chastise others for their wrongdoings.

My marriage has fallen apart.  I'm trusting God to bring it back together.  But I'm not just sitting around doing nothing.  We both had faults in this marriage, but nothing will ever be healed until I work on me.  God will work on him.

I've been praying to God to point out everything wrong about me. This is a harsh reality, let me tell you.  Criticism hurts even when it is constructive.  And for someone like me who has always prided herself on being right...it kills me to be so wrong.

But I also cannot tell you enough how freeing it feels to see clearly now.  I was praying earlier today and just thanked God for making me someone I actually like now.  I look back at who I used to be and am so appalled.  How did I even have friends?

I'm not done yet.  I'm working on me until the day I die.  I will always ask God to tell me where I am wrong because I am not perfect and never will be.  I will always ask Him to give me the desire to be more like Jesus, to be a better wife, mom, friend, daughter, sister, lover, human being.  Because walking with a plank sticking out of my face just isn't appealing to me.

Friends, I beg of you to look in the mirror.  Speaking purely from experience, when you see wrong in everything else and hate the world, it probably has something to do with what is in you.  Ask God to help you fix that.